Tag Archives: Dreams

When “greenery” finds a new meaning :-/

30 Jul

We work. We earn. The greener our perspectives become, I start to wonder where all the nobility went. It probably got tossed out the window the moment we realized we’re human, that we have needs, dreams, ambitions and desires, too. It’s a shame that our sincerity, dedication, talents, skills, education and determination to succeed are, for lack of a better option, put out there on scales of comparison, awarded tokens- silver, gold or platinum and allowed to become larger than who we really are as people- you and I.

Don’t you just begin to cringe internally, when you find yourself scowling and wondering, “Ow! He/she can’t be making that much money with merely that level of schooling. This is unfair- to me!” And yet, the fact is- we all do. Why can’t we ALL live in spacious homes, with enough dough on the table to run the show forever, with the freedom to study/work/be whatever/whoever/wherever we have always wanted and to settle wherever we deem perfect- just like that? (meaning- of course, no do-or-die exam terror, no visa hassles, no will-they-accept-my-application stress, no crying-over-the-best-job-there-is-out-there, no oh!-I-want-to-be-normal-like-everyone-else-too and no ow!-what-will-they-think-of-me rubbish; making that list as short as possible.) Why can’t we have all of this and not have to worry about disease or affliction ever coming upon our close ones (I know that would put my profession as a Medical Doctor in jeopardy, but isn’t that the ultimate rosy-eyed goal of every physician that ever enrolled into first year of Medical school?), while still being exactly who we are, while still wanting to succeed in each of our endeavors every single day (instead of simply greedily grabbing everything presented to us on multiple platters) and while continuing to be as driven towards a better world and a better tomorrow, as we are today?? WHY? Why can’t we have it all? I want it all. I do. I WANT abundant goodness.

I understand that I’m being impractical; thank you, but I don’t want to be hearing any of it- not just yet. I’m not ready to let go of my childhood, it’s (probably silly) fantasies and fairy-tale stories- knowing me, maybe, I never will. Am I trying to challenge God and His plans? No. Been there, done that; the good thing being, I know now that sooner or later, His Plans make utmost sense. So, I can ramble, argue and throw all the tantrums I want to, but there’ll come a day when I’ll roll my eyes at the naiveté that I’m being as I type this, today. Ah! Life! Why does it have to be this whole learn-grow-keep growing cycle? At least 7 times in each of my days, I hear myself screaming aloud, “God! Whatever were you thinking?” I can almost see Him laughing at me in response each time. He has surely gotten used to my madness, in every way thinkable and yes, long gotten over His initial shock to see what became of His once-tiny creation, too- I realize that despite my current state of mind; so, thank you for giving me some credit. (taking a bow!)

I’m complaining, inconclusive, adamant, (add hungry) right now; but I’ll be okay because we’re all ALWAYS okay, eventually. Phew. To be able to love who we are despite ourselves- that is exactly why God is God, you know? I think that’s simply amazing. (“Message delivered, brownie points earned! Yesss!” Haha! I kid, but thankfully, that totally lightens me up. :D)

Until another day, sayonara folks!

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