Tag Archives: Favors

Everybody loves themselves a mirror

25 Dec

I’m laughing so hard internally that I can feel my organs constantly bouncing off their permissible limit. It’s a funny world out there, if you haven’t noticed already! And I’m winning. 😉 😉

Struggling to climb the ladder doesn’t get you there. In fact, it only worsens your inferiority complex. I tell you that not to discourage you; I’ve just been there done that for about all my life- until now of course. And with your sad complexities, you only land up feeding the ego of every other dimwit that ever peeked into town. It feels sic, doesn’t it? Hmm. Relax. There is a cure.

If you’re anything like what I’ve been, you’re probably very meticulous, always trying hard to please, extra-jittery, too emotional about any and everything and perennially asking yourself, “Why doesn’t he/she (for example, the person in charge/boss) like me and treat me the way he/she treats everyone else? What have I done wrong?” You’re most likely too self-respecting to stoop and too honest to fake it. You KNOW that the pillars of the place you’re in will come crashing down the minute you’re gone, yet no one shows it; but does that knowledge make you feel secure in yourself? I’m guessing not.

Diplomacy is an art; why else would you think politics remains a winner? There is a fine line between using each pawn in a game of chess to your benefit and in becoming a victim of the game yourself. Each member of the army has his/her own significance; each one has their own insecurities, each one has inane things that make them tick, each one has their own pleasure points. Observe. Step into their shoes- I cannot stress that enough. How do they think?? What makes them emote? Set aside your emotions for a while. You cannot expect to gain, if they haven’t first been analyzed by you. Listen intently- a line, a pointer, a random statement- nothing ever, ever goes to waste. Know your priorities and race ahead to beat the winning horse. You can!

Watch what you say. Your body language, your expressions and your eye movements when you think no one notices- they all matter. Remain a mystery. Show different people different aspects of your personality; let them all feel like they know you- the personal touch they sense is important for your relationships to flourish. The advantage? Onions don’t cry much, do they? And if you haven’t noticed already, nobody manages to cut through every layer at once without shedding a bucketful of tears themselves. 😉 So, the odds of you losing are pretty darn low.

When two of your friends don’t get along, give each of them crisp, quality individual time; they will love you for it. Show maturity- understand, yet crib not! Everybody needs a soothing, calming talk. Give them what they want; you know it when you see them. Your weaknesses will diminish and get sucked into your core, plus the euphoria of tasting victory pretty much makes you forget those sore points entirely!

Lastly, accept favors. People adore, love and respect you. Let them show it! I mean that last one.

And yes, I am the same person you’ve been reading all along. Santa probably just dipped me into a bottle of shiny new paint and gave me my much-needed makeover. My ethics still dictate the beating of my heart and they always will; but if goodness must win, evil needs to concede without even realizing it- that’s what God and I decided last. Be a mirror. Help God!

Self-pride v/s The ways of the world

25 Jun

So much happens through high-strung connections in the world; be it getting into the perfect college, landing an interview, bagging a job, settling into a cushy career, snapping up exclusive business-deals, obtaining freebies (haha, 🙂 yes that too!) or finding a random associate of a friend’s distant, unheard-of relative who’ll lead you to just the thing you need.

I know there are people who’ll say, “What’s the point of having friends and family who won’t be there for you when you actually need the support, the guidance or the gentle push?” I am aware that most of them think of aid as just a smooth landing onto their initial platform; beyond which they’re on their own. That’s true and amounts to a great start, if you’re okay with it.

I’ll confess. I’m guilty of having accepted assistance when I’ve been in desperate conditions, myself. Whether I asked for it or not, help was at hand and was received. I can soften my heart when it comes to me and say, “Oh, it was a very small favor.” No, it wasn’t! No help is too small or too big; it is just right for the moment. Or I could say, “God placed them there for me at the right time.” Maybe. That answer, matter-of-factly, soothes my senses.

Yes, one might return the favor someday or do something else to show their sincere gratitude; I’m not here to debate on what is the better thing to do.

I’m just asking myself, “Would my pride permit me to accept help when I haven’t earned it on my own merit?” They say that, at times, you’ve got to drop your ego aside and just ask. Is it too small a deal- the asking? Really? Why does my heart not think so?

I know why I like doing things on my own, actually. It isn’t an ego issue or worse, if you’re thinking, a superiority complex. If you know me, you won’t even doubt that. I just like being able to face the mirror at the end of my day, to look myself in the eye and say, “Girl, you did it! And I am proud!” 🙂 I wouldn’t trade that feeling for anything in the world.

Would you call that being too principled or too vain? I don’t know.